How To Show Up For Yourself

 Hello beautiful people!

Welcome to BRIGHTER DAYS AHEAD Podcast - I am Kelly Ward - Your host. 

So I hope everyone has been enjoying their week. The weather has been absolutely gorgeous these last few days because it is Summer time and I have just been soaking up all of the sunshine and good vibes, so I hope you have had an amazing week so far. 

Today I want to discuss how to show up for yourself even when you don't feel like it. 

So what does showing up for yourself mean? Well...it basically means making choices that honor your emotional, physical, mental and  spiritual wellbeing. This is how we choose to take care of ourselves. Sometimes we go through struggles in life where we feel defeated and we feel down, and we find it hard to take care of ourselves, because all we want to do is run away from the pain or stress we are feeling. During those difficult times is when you need to really show up for yourself, even when you don't feel like it. 

In order to really show up for yourself, you have to be clear on who you are as a person, the goals you want to achieve in your life, what are your values, who are the people in your life that make you feel good, what people in your life do you need to rather let go of and what do you truly desire for your life and once you are aware of all of these aspects, your decisions will be easier to make. Let me share with you something that I do before making a decision. If I am struggling to decide or I am feeling anxious over a decision I need to make, I get a pen and paper, and I write down the pros and cons of the decision I need to make. Instead of making an emotionally decision or stressing myself out - I create a list of pros and cons and if the pros out weigh the cons, then I know whatever I decide, I am making the best decision for myself. That is a way of showing up for yourself, when you make a decision - based on what you need and what is going to benefit you in the best way. If you don't take care of yourself first, if you don't learn to love yourself first, you will never be happy in life, you will never have a healthy relationship, you will never be able to limit distractions holding you back from becoming the best version of yourself. So sometimes the toughest decisions to make, are going to benefit your life in a positive way, you need to be strong enough to do what is best for you. Many of you may struggle with self worth issues and self love wounds that require awareness so that you can heal. It is all apart of the journey, so don't stress, because I am going to discuss simple ways for you to start showing up for yourself. 

1. Make a commitment to yourself. One of the best ways to show up for yourself is to be disciplined and consistent when it comes to your goals. Whether it is working out, pursuing a passion or simply learning something new. You have to love yourself enough to commit to your future. However this is a lot easier said than done, for example - the end of last year, I planned to be as productive as I could be to end off the year and preparing myself mentally for the new year ahead, however I found I was easily distracted, discouraged and at times - falling into a bad mental space. As time went by, I tried my absolute best to snap out of it, I was patient with myself, I did a lot of reading and self- work and instead of making myself feel bad for making minimal progress that I promised myself I would, I decided to look within myself and figure out what is holding me back from moving forward and what needs to change. I realized that we are our own worst enemy and we can blame external aspects for why we aren't moving forward in life or we can look at ourselves and make a change right now. So to avoid that feeling of regret, commit to putting yourself ahead. This could mean, waking up early to work on your business, creating a morning routine, committing to a skincare routine, working out, making healthier food choices, saying no to spending money on unnecessary items or being consistent with a creative passion you have that brings you joy. It is through consistency and effort that we truly begin to see the results we want and it is through that progress that we realize what we are truly capable of achieving. 

2. Believe in yourself and take yourself seriously. Confidence is key when it comes believing in your own abilities, and it can be very easy to feel as if you are not good enough or don't have what it takes. Your skills, perspectives, dreams and abilities make you who you are. So believe in yourself. 

3. Speak up for yourself. Let's be real, we all doubt our emotions and it may be because we fear confrontation, being overbearing or looking stupid. However part of taking yourself seriously and honoring how you feel as a person, is by taking your thoughts and emotions seriously. It is important to understand why you are triggered by certain experiences in your life so that you can become aware of what needs to be healed in your life, so that you can grow. Something my dad always tells me in situations when I get frustrated or annoyed, is that - there is no point in getting frustrated - is it helping you or is it upsetting you? You need to take the time to learn how to control your emotions so that they don't control you and you need to learn how to speak up for yourself in situations when you feel mistreated. This does not mean, blowing up in someone's face, it means communicating calmly how you feel and being able to come from a place of calmness. This takes practice. 

4. Honor your boundaries. Showing up for yourself means choosing your peace before anything else. This could mean walking away from toxic situations and people, or it could also mean taking time away from your phone or social media, saying no because right now, you need to focus on your own happiness, or letting go of surrounding yourself around people who drain your energy. 

5. Stop caring about what people think. This can be so hard especially when social media has conditioned us to constantly compare ourselves. What you need to realize is that the opinions of others don't define you, you define yourself. So put yourself out there, pursue your dreams and this could be following a passion, posting what you want, wearing things that make you feel good, making decisions based on what you want and not what others think you should do and trusting your intuition because as long as you love who you are, and you love what you are doing, no one else's opinion should matter. 

When things feel tough and you feel as if you can't keep going. Keep showing up for yourself, keep pushing through. There is a powerful quote I read this morning and it says - Everybody comes to a point in their life when they want to quit. But it is what you do AT that moment, that determines who you are. 

Have a beautiful week!! 

I love you :)

Thank you for listening