(#4) distorted version of beauty

 Hello beautiful people!

Welcome back to WELLNESS BABE podcast. I am Kelly Ann Ward. 

How has your week been? I hope it has been amazing. 

On this week's episode, I am discussing the distorted version of beauty in today's world. This is a very talked about topic, however it needs to constantly be heard until it resonates with us and changes start to be made to the way we view beauty. There are unattainable body standards that have everyone morphing into my person or one type of look, that is found acceptable to society, and we have lost the beauty of individuality and embracing what makes us all unique. It is a sad reality that we face, however I always have hope that positive change can be made, if the noise is loud enough. 

Think about it for a moment. In the 1950s and early 60s, Marilyn Monroe was the epitome of sexy and beautiful, and she had a normal, healthy body. Today's body standards, say that women are expected to wear a full face of make up in their daily lives, stay skinny with curves in the right places and look young. So basically striving for constant perfection, which is not a healthy way to live life. However, even though in today's world, we have the opportunity to show our uniqueness, it is not always accepted. It is our human need to gravitate towards community, love and acceptance. We naturally seek to belong, that is why so many people choose to fit into the mold that society depicts as perfect, beautiful, sexy and perfect. Instead of embracing how a 'normal' woman lives her life, by eating food, having a job or maybe having children, we set unrealistic expectations of how all woman should be. We are definitely influenced by social media and pop culture. It can seem totally harmless, to subject yourself to social comparison, it can cause anxiety and affect your mental health. 

Have you heard of body dysmorphia?

Well, today I am going to discuss it briefly, so that you understand the concept, because it is an issue that so many people suffer from today. So basically it is a mental illness, where you focus on a perceived flaw in your own appearance. This specific flaw, could be minor or imagined, however someone who suffers from body dysmorphia, frequently examines their appearance in the mirror, compares themselves constantly to others and it becomes an obsession. I have had my own struggles with body image and eating disorders, which affected my mental health in such a negative way. Growing up, I disliked my appearance, I would compare myself to other beautiful girls, wondering why I didn't look like them, and it affected me, especially as a young girl who loved reading magazines and looking up to celebrities, and it impacted the way I viewed beauty. I tried every fad, trendy diet available, and nothing worked, and because nothing worked, it made me feel even more discouraged, and it become an unhealthy obsession to lose weight, be skinny and look perfect so that I could belong. When I went into the working environment, it only escalated and became worse, because I was criticized on how I looked and it definitely gets to you, especially at a younger age. 

So, what is body image?

Well, body image has to do with your emotional attitude, beliefs and perception of your own body. So basically, it could be what you believe in your mind that you look like, how you feel about your body shape, height, weight and also how other people view you, can also impact how you view yourself. You could have a positive body image, which is always an amazing thing, or if you have a negative view on your body, it can contribute to body dysmorphia or even eating disorders. The wellness industry is often depicted as a concept only for the privileged, however I feel we need to change that narrative because living a good life where you are focused on taking care of your well being, eating healthier, dealing with your emotions and traumas in a healthy way and choosing to strengthen yourself mentally, is a lifestyle attainable by all. When we focus on taking a step back and listening to our own needs, your life will shift, and the beauty of it all, is that there is no time constraint to figuring out what works best for you. Therefore stop adding so much pressure onto yourself and comparing your life to a highlight reel on social media, remain focused on what makes you happy and what you define the meaning of life has. Beauty is not only one type of look, it is embracing every thing that makes us unique. 

Having a positive body image is so important and it is an ongoing journey for some of us and that is totally okay. When you have a positive body image, it means that you understand that your self worth, has nothing to do with your appearance. It is about accepting and appreciating your body, how it looks and everything it does for you. It means loving yourself even though you have certain flaws and having a broader concept of what beauty is. This conversation is something that I am extremely passionate about, because we fall into the trap of trying to be accepted by people and we forget who we are and our unique we are. Through my own experiences of being insecure, having a negative body image, striving for perfection, having a bad relationship with food - I totally get it, and I want to use my own experiences to show you that you can get through it and come out on the other side, if I can. Depression, anxiety, self harm and eating disorders are serious issues that stem from people who are struggling with their body image and who are very aware of the distorted image of beauty. It is affecting people everywhere and you need to realize that you are absolutely beautiful no matter what. What makes you different is what makes you beautiful. That is what beauty means to me. It is about celebrating your uniqueness and the parts of yourself that is imperfect. 

Let's discuss where a negative body image comes from?

Your body image does not develop all by yourself. It could be developed from culture, family or friends who perhaps convey positive and negative messages about the body. Social media, colleagues or family members can all influence they way you view body image. They encourage people, from a young age, what is an accepted, ideal way to look. However the image is usually a distorted one. The fashion and film industry also sets an unhealthy example of what type of people or body types would be fitting to portray a leading role or what model is going to display their products in campaigns or on the runaway. The discrimination based on race, size, gender orientation and age also plays a major role and these types of exposure in society, can cause people to feel as if they aren't good enough and are somehow lacking something. Even though that is not the case. 

I want to share some simple tips to help improve your body image. So here are some tips that may help you feel more positive about your body. 

1. Surround yourself with people who have a positive outlook.

2. Practice more positive self talk, where you identify 5 things you love about yourself and your body. 

3. Try your best to not compare yourself with other people. 

4. Remind yourself that beauty is not just about physical appearance. 

5. Wear clothes that make you feel good about yourself and where you feel comfortable in your own skin. Confidence is key. You go Glen Coco. 

6. Choose to work towards a healthier lifestyle, where you eat a healthier and wholesome diet, you work on improving your mental health and you focus on taking care of your own needs and your own happiness. 

My advice is that you should focus on loving yourself more, embracing what makes you unique and not caring what other people may think. Focus on developing your self worth and becoming stronger from within. When you love yourself, you won't care if other people don't. 

I really hope you enjoyed this week's episode of WELLNESS BABE.

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Thank you so much for listening.

I love you. 

Ciao :)